The Hangover 4: Pops Is Getting Married Next Weekend

The Fun Happy Part:

My dad had a good ass time. We had been trying to have his bachelor party for about 5 weeks in a row but due to weather, shit never panned out. This weekend being Valentine’s Day weekend and all..shit was REALLY up in the air but we made it happen. 19 of us showed up to send Pop Dukes off on his last weekend as a free man at the dollar store. I think he was more surprised that I was there than there being a gaggle of niggas. A herd of niggas. A bounty of niggas. A murder of niggas. A school of niggas even. It’s taken Fat Boy and I some years to finally reach an understanding. We still butt heads but..we try. It’s nice to see him happy for a while. I could tell how ripped he was because he told me 7 times that he loved me. That’s more times in the last 27 years that i’ve heard it. He had fun. We had fun. I got to spoil my pops for a night and I’m glad I was in a position to do so.

The Sad Unfun Part:

When we were leaving, everyone was on their phones calling their girlfriends and wives talking about “I’m on my way home, be up when I get there.” How the fuck do you feel like a 3rd wheel and you’re not even around? LOL It kind of shed light on some things that I didn’t want light shed on. I had been ignoring my parents’ questions of “who’s your +1?”, “are you bringing someone”, “heeey, whatever happened to *insert name*” and “do you plan on being single for the rest of your life?” Worry about your old ass selves, you old people.

The Weird/Funny Part:

I spent a good hour listening to the dollar store dancers say to each other “girl, his beard is soft as fuck. he did a body shot off me and it tickled. His lips soft too..i bet whoever he going home to tonight gone get it.” I’m blind, not deaf. Also heard 2 women talking about my hands. It’s always weird when the shoe is on the other foot in a social setting. I try to remain as inconspicuous as possible when out and it makes me a little uneasy when I’m the focus of attention. It’s partly the reason I don’t go out that often since I became sober. I’m not the dollar store type and everyone knows it, so it was fucking hilarious watching people’s faces when I walked in the door.

This is the most disjointed ass post I have ever written in life. Nothing goes together. Ham…no burger. Fuck it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.
Required fields are marked:*


Go Away *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.