{"id":1978,"date":"2014-02-16T13:46:39","date_gmt":"2014-02-16T18:46:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/?p=1978"},"modified":"2014-02-16T03:26:25","modified_gmt":"2014-02-16T08:26:25","slug":"the-hangover-4-pops-is-getting-married-next-weekend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/?p=1978","title":{"rendered":"The Hangover 4: Pops Is Getting Married Next Weekend"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The Fun Happy Part:<\/p>\n<p>My dad had a good ass time. We had been trying to have his bachelor party for about 5 weeks in a row but due to weather, shit never panned out. This weekend being Valentine&#8217;s Day weekend and all..shit was REALLY up in the air but we made it happen. 19 of us showed up to send Pop Dukes off on his last weekend as a free man at the dollar store. I think he was more surprised that I was there than there being a gaggle of niggas. A herd of niggas. A bounty of niggas. A murder of niggas. A school of niggas even. It&#8217;s taken Fat Boy and I some years to finally reach an understanding. We still butt heads but..we try. It&#8217;s nice to see him happy for a while. I could tell how ripped he was because he told me 7 times that he loved me. That&#8217;s more times in the last 27 years that i&#8217;ve heard it. He had fun. We had fun. I got to spoil my pops for a night and I&#8217;m glad I was in a position to do so.<\/p>\n<p>The Sad Unfun Part:<\/p>\n<p>When we were leaving, everyone was on their phones calling their girlfriends and wives talking about &#8220;I&#8217;m on my way home, be up when I get there.&#8221; How the fuck do you feel like a 3rd wheel and you&#8217;re not even around? LOL It kind of shed light on some things that I didn&#8217;t want light shed on. I had been ignoring my parents&#8217; questions of &#8220;who&#8217;s your +1?&#8221;, &#8220;are you bringing someone&#8221;, &#8220;heeey, whatever happened to *insert name*&#8221; and &#8220;do you plan on being single for the rest of your life?&#8221; Worry about your old ass selves, you old people.<\/p>\n<p>The Weird\/Funny Part:<\/p>\n<p>I spent a good hour listening to the dollar store dancers say to each other &#8220;girl, his beard is soft as fuck. he did a body shot off me and it tickled. His lips soft too..i bet whoever he going home to tonight gone get it.&#8221; I&#8217;m blind, not deaf. Also heard 2 women talking about my hands. It&#8217;s always weird when the shoe is on the other foot in a social setting. I try to remain as inconspicuous as possible when out and it makes me a little uneasy when I&#8217;m the focus of attention. It&#8217;s partly the reason I don&#8217;t go out that often since I became sober. I&#8217;m not the dollar store type and everyone knows it, so it was fucking hilarious watching people&#8217;s faces when I walked in the door.<\/p>\n<p>This is the most disjointed ass post I have ever written in life. Nothing goes together. Ham&#8230;no burger. Fuck it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Fun Happy Part: My dad had a good ass time. We had been trying to have his bachelor party for about 5 weeks in a row but due to weather, shit never panned out. This weekend being Valentine&#8217;s Day &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/?p=1978\">Continue reading<span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1978","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random-shit","p1"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8Hp0F-vU","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1978","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1978"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1978\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1979,"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1978\/revisions\/1979"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1978"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1978"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gullierthanthou.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1978"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}